Man Rule #1038 – Men are the Killers

Man Rule #1038: A Bug, a bear, it doesn’t matter. If needed, you should be able to kill it.

Its 4:30am, you are sound asleep dreaming about the big business meeting you’ve got tomorrow. The wife/girlfriend/twins you met at the bar last night shake you violently and say “There’s something in the bathroom, go get it!”. While you may roll your eyes, science is the reason we are the killers, and they wake our asses up.

In caveman times, there was a hunter/gatherer society. Essentially, the men went out and found a saber toothed tiger to kill and drag back to the cave while the women of the tribe found some berries, took care of the kids, and made sure the fire was going when your ass came home.

Neanderthal Man Fighting Tiger

Women, trying to get us killed since the beginning of time

Cut to today, the shoulder-pad revolution supposedly broke all “glass ceilings” – all except one. When it comes to killing stuff, its still our job. What do you guys think? Do your women go hunting with you? Or do you still find yourself wielding the fly swatter/shotgun/baseball bat when some sort of creature or being intrudes on the home front?

Tell us your stories in the comments.

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  1. John Russell says:

    Well lets see there was that one time when 2 bears a gator and 6 pythons got in the cabin.
    Lets just say they were good eats!

  2. Robert says:

    I hear they taste like chicken.

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