Submitted By: Smooth Lou 701

Revokee: Mark Last-Name-Omitted-For-Legal-Reasons

Reason For Revocation:

Tarzana — A pair of testicles and spine were reported missing by the friends of an area man on October 14th less than four weeks after the man in question admitted he hadn’t watched an NFL or NCAA football game in weeks. The gonad-less man, Mark Last-Name-Omitted-For-Legal-Reasons, 43, last reported seeing his sack just prior to meeting (name withdrawn), a sexy, slender MILF from (location withdrawn), whom he’s been spending all of his time with.

Saturday and Sunday’s football games and MLB playoffs pushed his total missed games in the four week span to over 300, which includes Thursday night NFL/NCAA games, Saturday D-I, -II,-III games and DVR-ed games. However, according to sources close to him, he hasn’t even considered recording sporting events, but there is speculation he has been recording “Real Housewives of (Whatever),” his lady-friend’s favorite show and the show in which he’s replaced football and baseball.

Friends reported seeing Facebook posts from Mark Last-Name-Omitted-For-Legal-Reasons bragging about missing games for luncheons, to watch the “Real Housewives of (Whatever)” and to do “unmanly” things around the house.

To make matters worse, according to friends, Mark Last-Name-Omitted-For-Legal-Reasons doesn’t seem to care who’s playing, how his favorite team fared, or if the replacement referees are still officiating.

Sadly, he doesn’t care anymore; he’s brazenly wearing a shawl instead of hat and T-shirt with the name of his favorite teams.

Friends of this egregious violator of manhood ask the experts of and to this site to make the final decision whether his man-car should be permanently revoked…and keep in this in mind: Just yesterday he posted a photo on Facebook of him and his lady-friend smooching with the shameful caption: “Is there a football game on?” That, as a minimum, is suspension, but more likely a lifetime ban of his man-card, plead his friends.